Forgiveness is deciding that some wrong you believe a person did of their own free will does not matter anymore. It is a form of mercy which reduces or cancels the punishment a person deserves. You become their friend again and refuse to treat them with the anger they deserve. People say forgiveness is not weak and is not pretending that the wrongdoing was not so bad after all but is about freeing yourself and hopefully the offender from bad feelings to live better in the future. In practice it is saying the wrongdoing is nothing to worry about. A bit of anger can be a good thing. It is what you do with it that counts. There is no doubt that forgiveness has the same results as condoning which is pretending that the past evil does not matter. In practice and in theory they are the same so forgiveness is hypocritically rewarding evil. You can be upset at the loss of life a murderer caused but not be upset about the abuse of his will which led to that so forgiving does not mean you will be upset no more about the deaths. To say a past evil you did with your free will does not matter is the same as saying that you don’t matter for you can go beneath yourself and should. Forgiveness is evil. The excuse for making a distinction between forgiving and condoning is that you can forgive and still punish for punishment is intended for the person’s own good and everybody else’s. The punishment has nothing to do with the evil act for it has been pardoned. It’s done for other reasons so it is not really punishment but glorified revenge. At the same time we are still dealing with condoning here. It’s a confused mixture. Sometimes people who condone have to send the criminals they condoned to jail. You should punish because you condemn and you have decided not to condemn therefore to punish would be revenge and inconsistent with heartfelt forgiveness.
We do not believe in forgiveness for there is nothing to forgive when choice does not exist. Do not hold grudges. There is nothing to forgive and keep affirming and believing that and the grudge will disappear. True - other people should not have hurt you, but they were not in their right minds when they hurt you. A grudge is an act of self-hatred because it prolongs the pain and the hurt in yourself. It is crazy to hold a grudge against a person who slaps you in the face when by holding the grudge you are creating more pain for yourself than that person ever created for you. Most of the time, we hold grudges against people we do not know that well while we love our friends though they have done worse. That is harmful thinking and is caused by unfair suspicion. Let go of the personal antagonism but do not forget the offence when it is necessary to remember. It is true that we encourage crime by not holding any spite but as the criminal has no free will there is no room for spite at all and so we cannot hold any.
The fact that there are many evils that can be inflicted on us that we do not fear as much as others or perhaps do not fear at all shows that we are in control of our reactions and that gives us hope and confidence that we can win and be happy despite what life throws at us.
I forgive because I feel like it not because I think I should therefore I am condoning the offence for I ignore the offence and just worry about what I feel. Anything I do I do it for my indulgence. Therefore I do not really forgive my enemy because if I did I would be doing it for their sake too which is one of the things forgiveness is supposed to be about. Forgiveness is a sanctimonious sham and all shams are detrimental to the health of the mind. We reject forgiveness; it is letting go we believe in. We believe in the real thing. Not doing it forces the past to have an unhealthy hold on you and make you afraid and fear breeds more fear and more evil and those who work and live with us will be affected by it. Most of your problems will be instantly solved if you let go.
Forgiveness is evil because it rewards an evil that is freely brought into existence. We behave much the same way as people who forgive do but that is not because we condone but because we have to do it for criminals have been perverted by forces not under their control. That is why we have to put up with the same bad consequences that come about when people forgive.
Without forgiving and instead replacing it with an understanding that ceases to want to hurt the wrongdoer but wants to help them live as decent people we avoid the pitfall of pretending we can love the sinner and not the sin which is plainly seen to be hypocrisy when you translate it as blame the sin and not the sinner and is more positive and encouraging for no condemnation is involved.
Understanding and letting go of the past is what we believe in and we must remember that it is not other people that we have to do this for because when we hold a grudge the true target of the grudge is ourselves and we only kid ourselves that it is the person(s) who hurt us we hate. The grudge only hurts you and is you punishing yourself for wrong being done to you. To accept and love yourself is the only thing you need to do and the only way to have affection for others.
