Unconditional love is the same as undeserved love or love that does not care what should be done with you as long as it makes you feel good and has you looked after well. It is wanting the best for others without it being about you trying to value yourself as good or for getting any good feelings/rewards. It is just love.

Those who demand to be loved unconditionally are narcissists, "Love has no buts so if you want to change me or try to you do not love me."  They try to impose a good opinion of them on others and condemn them if they fail to give it.

Unconditional love these days argues that you must love yourself unconditionally and that is the sun that shines rays of unconditional love to others. So it is about you and everybody else gets the leftovers. Loving others is just an offshoot of loving yourself. That is not unconditional love for others at all.

Christians may correct me here. They say that love to be real has no conditions but that does not mean it does not care what should be done with you. Unconditional love will be concerned if you go down the wrong path. It will try to respectfully help you see that but does this for it values you as a person no matter what. Yet in many circles, unconditional love is seen as love that makes no demands. Love the harmful person hate the harm is so forced and fake that the Christian understanding of unconditional love is just sanctimonious nonsense. They show the faith is a danger to persons considered to be outside the moral boundary.

Anyway unconditional love is not about you fulfilling a need to just love or to love a particular person. That is just a form of self-glorification and lying to the object of this love.

Love is a free gift that asks for nothing back not even love.

It wants others to be happy even if it means they have to leave you and stop loving you. It celebrates their happiness.

Conditional love then is mild hate for it is about rejecting and devaluing the person in such a way that it looks like accepting and taking while it looks like giving. It is a lie.

Hate is an evil but evil has its problems too as well as love and is one of the reasons love is not as clear in meaning as it likes to look.

So far we have learned that love is vague for its opposites are vague too and we all mix love and evil together. Unconditional love then is a lie. To say God loves us like that is an insult for how can creatures like us know what unconditional love means? It will be coloured by our warped and prejudicial idea of love.


Let us ask if love/hate/indifference is real then how it came about.

What is love derived from? Hate? Indifference?

What is hate derived from? Love? Indifference?

What is indifference derived from? Hate? Love?

Do they just appear? Do you just choose?

Indifference is more natural and common than either love or hate so indifference grows into love or hate.

How does love get along with reason?

Reason is a tool that gives you a dignity that non-humans do not have and you can avoid error with it by thinking correctly and in tune with what is real for what is real does not care about what you think. But you need to think correctly to avoid dangers. So reason and love go together in principle but in practice reason cannot tell you it is wrong to look after yourself and your family and ignore the pain outside your front door. Reason works through showing up contradictions but there is no contradiction in that or in the view that for some reason only you and perhaps your loved ones exist while everybody else is just an illusion. The paradox is that love is needed by reason while reason and love attack each other.

Reason cannot prove that anybody else exists apart from you and maybe your family. So it is not helpful if you are going to love somebody other than yourself. There is no logical absurdity in thinking you alone are real and living in some dream.

That again shows that love is vague.

Clear definition or not, in practical terms, love is hard to apply. This is another deep and huge and destructive problem. Take Mormons. For them loving yourself meant being glad to have your blood spilled to atone for your sins. Loving your neighbour to death meant that you could call on fellow Mormons to stab or shoot you so that the blood would flow and your unpardonable sin would be dealt with.

The best view is that ideas about love are more about people wanting to feel so special that others do not mind what harm they do.

Unconditional love is love for love’s sake not yours. It is therefore virtue-signalling. Mostly it is a euphemism for being celebrated no matter what you do or don’t do.  If you affirm and celebrate such "love" you are only contributing to a culture of lies and harm.


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