Self-esteem is about accepting yourself as good as you are. The self-esteem method means instead of always trying to feel better about yourself you go and do good and the feelings will come. It takes great courage and self-esteem to use that method and trust yourself with it.


You can have poor self-esteem and still achieve great things. But they are not great for you if you do not have the self-esteem to enjoy them.

If you truly love and have confidence in yourself, you will not wilfully and maliciously or callously hurt others. You will have the confidence to believe that if you embrace the happiness and peace that comes from loving others then your life will be good. Hurting people to get what you want is telling yourself that you are going to inspire people to start working against what you want. That isn't the way you behave if you really want it. If you do want it then you will get it through kindness to others and love for them.

Try to be the very best you can be. But you alone must decide what this is to be and where the benchmark is. For some people for example, being a good nurse who occasionally forgets to do things is perfection. That's fine. Just be realistic. Then you will be able to be the best in your own eyes and not second-best.

Treat every day as special and as if it matters immensely. Dress up s if you are going somewhere important for you always are. Even if you go to dump something in your rubbish bin you are still doing something important.

It is when you think of other people and help them that you do the most loving thing for yourself. You will enjoy your bath more if you think you are doing it so that you will smell nice for other people. Whoever lives and thinks this way will program their lives to deliver blessing after blessing. They will not go without their reward. But you are celebrating yourself with and for others. Having the bath for others to enjoy you is really a different way of enjoying and pleasing yourself. It is not altruistic.

The more I trust myself the more I will trust others. True self-esteem does not result in anti-social activity such as heavy drinking or stealing. If I steal I am saying others should steal from me. I am programming myself to engage in disorder and to damage myself. What I call bad or evil is disorder. If I create disorder I create what can destroy me.

Cosmetic surgery will never improve your sense of self-worth. However, you can use it to do that. So it is really you not the surgery that gives you the self-worth. If you look after the outside, the spirit gets happier and has a healthier outlook.

Correct self-love makes me sociable and approachable!

If I am an island (a sociable island is still an island), I fail to honour myself and to work for the honour that is due to me simply because I cannot be happy for too long if I am on my own.

Apathy in the sense that we are going to look at it is not caring about doing good in the world or checking evil where possible. It is an attack on yourself.

Do not even think about human sin or human evil. Everybody could pick out the three best compliments they got in their life. Those will be the compliments that cause a warm feeling. Use them like mantras.

To love myself is not to distract myself from working for the wellbeing of others. If I value myself properly, others benefit and I am a joy to them. To value my joy with others is to value myself. I can find joy in all people.

If I love myself I feel good. And if I feel good I am a better help to others. The better I am at turning my problems into challenges to be met, the more I love myself and the more time and energy I have to help others. Loving myself sets me free.

Prayer is corrupting for it is not needed and a self-esteem exercise is far better. To say that prayer is better is to say that self-esteem is not important. Nevertheless the Church regards prayer as totally indispensable for salvation.

If the Church were really inspired by God it would be adept at inducing self-esteem in its followers. The gospel doctrine would be largely about the wisdom that produces self-esteem and the Bible would be written similar to Louise Hay’s books. It is not so either the Bible and the Church are bunkum or God wants you to hate your own guts.


When a person treats self-esteem as a magical force that leads to reinforced self-esteem that is really occultism using the beauty of self-esteem for superstitious ends. What we propose is nothing magical. Self-esteem realises that it can be challenged and refuses to use placebo belief magic as a shield. True self-esteem embraces courage and courage means keeping your eyes on reality.


No objection to the primacy of self-esteem succeeds. To choose anything else is just silly. It is also an inalienable right and the foundation of all rights.

Self-esteem cannot be grown overnight. The following habits are necessary:

Be more aware of what is happening around you. This builds up confidence.

Accept yourself as you are and accept what you have done in the past and remind yourself how you have learned.

Take responsibility and do not blame others or life.

Act and do not be passive.

Accept your right to assert yourself and avoid the pitfalls of self-suppression.

Act with purpose in mind. Have a plan and have the confidence to work out a good fall-back plan.

No one else determines your worth. Only you decide that and you decide it by taking a journey.

No one else can dictate what you deserve. Only you can read you.

Other people’s reactions, responses and feelings are not your responsibility. You can't do anything to control those things.

The opinion somebody has of you may be right but they don't have it because they know for sure. They just happen to hit the bullseye so they cannot be as sure as they might say they are.

All these things suggest that the work is yours and nobody else's and not even God's.


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