Jesus when he taught you must love your neighbour as yourself was being very manipulative.  Locking that into his ideology meant that a person who would try to leave it would be seen as insulting their neighbour and rejecting proper love for them.

Bible talk about love and love your neighbour must be read in the light of how both Old and New Testaments seek to give you a reason to die and insist that life is hard and dangerous so you may as well use it by living a difficult though righteous life. Jesus said we all have a cross and a cross is about a slow execution. And there are many texts that are about honour. Honour was put first in those days. Honour appears in the ten commandments with regarding to honouring your father and mother which means “don’t disgrace them” more than anything else.  Religious experts take it to mean that yes but not just that.  They say it is about respecting all honorable authority such as your enslaver, your master, and your king.  They say that it is about honour and honour is more expansive than just parents.

Jesus himself defended the death penalty for boys who cursed their parents. That harsh judgement shows how strongly his religious faith was about honour.

As the main command is to love God and honour him with all your heart your motive in honouring others is to honour the God in them. But it underlines that it is about honour. The believer is asked by Jesus to pray and not to do it for favours but to align with what God wills. In that light “treat others as you want to be treated” is referring to somebody who is about trying to line up to God’s will.

Jesus does not forgive the adulteress in John 8 but merely says he does not condemn her to death which means only on that occasion.  He allowed her to be dishonoured and embarrassed.

He humiliated the Canaanite pagan woman and called her a dog and was slow to listen to her.  She only got help when she admitted to his satisfaction that she was inferior to him and his Jewish culture and race.

Jesus links forgiveness to you accepting that it is over and the other has agreed to make amends and repent.  Matthew 18 has him saying you must treat a brother who won't change as a tax collector - ie pariah.  Honour based systems are unforgiving and give out similar accounts of forgiveness and don't care that they are not very effective.  Jesus made sure that forgiving would be seen as a horrible thing when he said that those who do not forgive will suffer before God and be judged.  Forced or pressured forgiveness is not forgiveness.  It is about honour and show but it is not real.

Even the supposed return of Jesus from the dead is about defeating the humiliation of the cross.  It is about honour and Jesus boasted that God would honour him and raise him up.

Honour is why women accused of adultery are cast out.  Honour is why they are often beaten and killed.  Honour is why you will be murdered in many parts of the world for changing your faith.  Honour puts pressure on people to live their lives for others without ever being true to themselves.  Religion is not the only thing that takes love and flavours it with honour.  Husbands hit their spouses for perceived dishonour.  It is love but bad love. 


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